The Difference the Truth Makes….

L’ampoule s’est allumée pour moi à 43 ans et ce fut un véritable sentiment de perte

Adoptee in Recovery

It’s been so heavy on my mind to write about the difference in young adoptees and older adoptees learning their truth.

There is a HUGE difference! 

I know so many adoptive parents wait and have their own reasons for keeping quite about their child’s history, identity, roots, biological family, etc. They have reasons why they don’t “come clean” about all the information they have in regards to their adoptive child. Many years ago, many of them were told to keep quiet, because back in the “Day” that was supposed to be the best thing for everyone. Many adoptive parents have taken this very vital and critical information to their graves, all because they were told keeping it a secret was the best thing to do. Many adoptees find out their truth after their adoptive parents pass away, and long hidden documents are uncovered, somewhere in all their belongings. Many adoptive…

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Dear blocked adoptive parent…

Dans le cadre de mes recherches, j’ai dû affronté mes persécuteurs. Mes parents adoptifs n’ont jamais éprouvé la honte de me dire, 43 ans après, qu’ils savaient que j’avais deux frères aînés… L’évêque maronite n’avait pas honte mais seulement peur que je dévoile dans un écrit ce que je savais de leur trafic, quant à la religieuse, elle a écrit : “C’est la signature du Père…”, me laissant penser que j’étais le Fils, se remettant à Dieu… Rien de cela n’était sérieux, un grand carnaval inversé, où les persécuteurs étaient les victimes, ensuite chacun reprenait sa place… Tout ce que tu dis m’indique que la Grande Fête est terminée !

Daniel Drennan ElAwar

…who finds the need to email me and explain that I somehow don’t “understand” adoption and that adoption is somehow “different” in the UK:

The history of adoption in terms of Anglo-Saxon society reflects a targeting of the poor, the marginal, the “base classes”, the Indigenous, the colonized. That 120 years later this still takes place in the UK (not to mention that you still live in a “kingdom”) is beyond mind-boggling, and this horrifying state of affairs stands no matter how you package it, now matter how you market it, no matter how you promote it. I think it is fair to say at this point that adoption has done nothing to ease the class division in English society, or the disdain of the English for those they consider to be “sub-par”, including the parents of the children temporarily in your care. I’m not sure why you feel the…

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Effets secondaires

Depuis que j’ai retrouvé, toutes les fois où je dois discuter de ma place : dans ma famille proche, au travail, et même quand je me gare, dans la file des voitures quand je dois me rabattre, je vis un stress énorme. Palpitations, jambes molles, vision double… Je ne peux pas être dans l’après, ni même dans l’avant, je suis dans l’instant-instant : fixer mon regard sur une flamme qui brille, ne percevoir que son infime mouvement et voilà presque tout, comme un nouvel exercice de ma vie.